text.

[bloodpacks]

[citizens of omega, this fine creature right here is about to take care of all your pyjak problems.] HEAR YOU HAVE PYJAK PROBLEM. DECIDED TO TAKE CARE OF IT OURSELVES.

VARREN LOVE PYJAK MEAT. THEY WILL TAKE CARE OF FILTHY SCAVENGERS.

WILL TAKE PAYMENT IN FORM OF CREDITS. OR WEAPONS. CAN ALWAYS USE WEAPONS.

WELCOME.

[there are now varren running rampant around the station, slaughtering space monkeys. enjoy that.]

Video;

[tasteslikecoconut]

Okay. This?

[Watch him make a general jerking sweeping motion that encompasses everything about everything.]

Crap. All of it. [Now watch him tick off the crap with his fingers.]

So let's make a little count here: No water - meaning no water to make that very important concoction called coffee. That I can deal with. For now. Like, what, you can live a couple weeks without water, right? I can't live without coffee for more than a week tops.

But then! Then we have, what, space monkeys? They make noises. Weird ones! And they shit everywhere! But fine, space monkeys in space. Whatever, I'll deal.

No really, I'd deal with the space monkeys. Why? Because now there are god damn fish dogs. Like this one. This one right here.

[The video blurs for a moment before landing on a varren, with beady big blue eyes and it's breathing heavily, drooling on the grimy floor as if sizing up its next meal. Here's a hint: it's probably Tony. The video goes back to the genius not-so-billionaire not-quite-philanthropist, taking refuge on his countertop with a rusty frying pan.]

So yeah. Crap.