03 | text

[tradecraftdude]

MISSING

PET PYJAK
ANSWERS 2 JOEY
DO NOT SHOOT
DO NOT EAT
DO NOT FEED BACON

RSPND 2 THIS MSG W/LEADS

[ Attached to the post is a slightly blurry photograph of a pyjak wearing a harness made out of cable ties, and a dogtag around its neck reads 'JOEY RAMOAN'. ]

Comments

text

[tradecraftdude]

i didnt ask u

wtf kind of name is derek 4 a pyjak

text;

[jumpiness]

derek is a good name for a dopey looking creature with a small brain.

better than "ramoan" or w/e that is.

[tradecraftdude]

w/e

also wut planet r u from??

u no

like the ramoans

JUDY IS A PUUUUUNK

[jumpiness]

do you mean the ramones???

shit man i thought you were mispelling samoan or somethign

[tradecraftdude]

duh

ramoans

god

wut does this have 2 do w/girl scout cookies

[jumpiness]

those are samoas

not the same thing, but delicious.

are there girl scout cookies here

[tradecraftdude]

have u SEEN ne girl scouts here

ive barely seen girls period

[jumpiness]

um i've seen plenty of girls

i live with two of them actually...

[tradecraftdude]

wtf how does a complete dweeb like u find 2 girls 2 live with???

[jumpiness]

HEY

not a complete dweeb

also the girl you were arguing with, lydia, she's from my home town.

the other i met when she arrived, she's been chilling here.

[tradecraftdude]

ugh lydias so annoying

whats the other girls name maybe ill have beter luck w/her

i started giggling

[jumpiness]

she is not annoying she's just really smart, dude.

her name is rachel? she's like this crazy warrior fashion goddess.

they're getting along and it's scary.

1/3

[tradecraftdude]

..........................

2/3

[tradecraftdude]

..........................

3/3

[tradecraftdude]

ARE YOU COMPLETELY FUCKING INSANE

i laughed again

[jumpiness]

no??

i'm pretty sane dude what is there something I should know about her

[ uncomfortable reminder he watched her turn into an alien creature that beat up batarians and they still haven't really talked about it ]

[tradecraftdude]

yea

u should no that shes totaly crazy

like unstable out of her mind malfunctional

and kind of a bitch

[jumpiness]

look man idk but she's been pretty chill so far.

most of the women i know can be bitchy so i believe that but maybe she just doesn't like you.

also you know she can read this right

[tradecraftdude]

just u wait

she had no reason 2 dislike me

just
u
wait

[ marco's going to ignore that last bit because who the fuck cares ]

[jumpiness]

well

okay buddy.

btw, still haven't matched up for that cheeseburger vs pizza show.

[tradecraftdude]

k i was gonna get lunch neway

id bring something over but not if she-who-must-not-b-named is around

[jumpiness]

ha ha ha

where do you u work i'll bring a burger by, i think i've seen a place.

[tradecraftdude]

k sure good luck finding a reel burger

[ have some coords to the pizza shop, bro ]

[jumpiness]

shut your mouth it'll be the best burger ever.

[ annnnd coordinates recieved, he goes about buying two cheeseburgers to share with this kid. oddly enough, he has a feeling they're probably varren or synthetic meat or whatever, but as long as they taste like cow, he doesn't complain, and they've been okay thus far.

no mcdonalds but what can you do.

with a bag in hand he finds the pizza shop and starts looking for the kid in question. he doesn't actually expect this kid to be younger than rachel, but he looks a little. still, stiles wanders over to him and shakes the bag at him. ]

Yo dawg.

[tradecraftdude]

[ look MARCO'S JUST SMALL FOR HIS AGE OKAY

he's hanging around outside of the shop, sitting on the step where he usually waits for orders to be called in, and gives stiles a little cool-guy lift of the chin. ]

Yo homewrecker.