outsiders | oo1. | ℒ

Entry tags:

lydia martin

oo1. | ℒ | video

[The girl on the video that you're watching appears to be extremely confident. Her posture is straight, not rigid, but definitely trying to impress upon others that she's not going to take any bullshit. Her strawberry blonde hair is swept back, small braids pulling the sides of her hair away and tucked into a small gathering. The rest lays flat and she hopes makes her seem older than she is.]

I've been here only a short time and I've seen how quickly things can go to hell. [This is actually something she has experience in and her tone of voice does not imply that she's concerned for these sort of incidents.]

I do realize, that my current employment, the job that everyone has at first, seems to be well-suited for someone that isn't as overqualified as I am. As such, I'm looking for something more challenging. I've attached a file to this video that lists my skills and my preferred fields of employment. [Those looking at the file will see an impressive list of mathematical and science qualifications. She shows proficiency in analytical and practical maths. She's also familiar with spatial theory and physics. Her areas of knowledge for science edge toward chemistry and physiology. She marks down that she is familiar with the anatomy of humans from Earth. She also lists her organization and willingness to lead.]

I know that the range of inhabitants here is not limited to human, but I am a fast learner and I am more than willing to do the work to learn. [It feels good to state her intelligence; to not worry that someone will judge her for it or look at her differently. She has a different level to achieve, to strive for and if that means presenting herself in the best possible light for this setting -- that's what she'll do.]

Any interested parties can contact me with any suggestions or offers for employment.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

wow what a no-it-all

[ yes, that is all marco got out of this post ]

I'm sure you'll understand if I don't value your opinion.

are u worried a peon like me wont understand nething u say

Considering your lack of consideration for
spelling and proper grammar, yes.

Edited 2013-04-20 22:22 (UTC)

maybe u could consider that i have so much stuff 2 consider that i cant waste ne considerating on typing wen u can clearly understand me

I speak plenty of languages. Text message is just one of them.

do u speak ne dialects that arent 'total stuckup babe'?

Are you trying to imply that my professional approach to finding employment is stuck up, because I'm a female? Am I not allowed to exhibit leadership skills and prove I am a value to someone else? If a man had done the same thing would you still have thought it was a 'no it all' who was 'stuckup'?

[marco...............]

Edited 2013-04-20 22:37 (UTC)

[ in over your head, marco ]

uhh does my answer need 2 b in the form of a question

Are you short on remarks all of a sudden? No more sexist remarks? No more deciding to view my intelligence and determination as a negative thing, because I'm female?

rly who said this was about u being a girl its about u being a total elitest ok i have no problems w/girls i actually like them alot

You used the phrase stuckup babe when referring to my intelligence. Also, the fact is that I don't see how it's elitism to want a better job. Since when is seeing success seen as a bad thing?

no that was refering to ur personality u can climb the job ladder w/o looking like ur trying 2 compensate 4 ur bitchy personality by publicly showing off ur resume like ur trying 2 run 4 class president or something

[She rolls her eyes.]

This is not a resume. It's a list of skills and areas that I'm adept at. A resume requires far more specific details and a work history. Which, I've never worked in space. I don't have any references. And it's so nice to know that you judge my personality on my professionalism and drive to get a job. Did I come up with a brilliant idea and you're just jealous that you didn't think of it first?

Edited 2013-04-20 23:46 (UTC)

already ahead of u babe no how i got a job? i walked into a place i wanted 2 work and asked for 1 and they gave it 2 me so good luck sitting there looking pretty and hoping some1 will just walk by and hand u one because u think u deserve it

I'm sorry for whoever was desperate enough to hire you so easily. And the part of this, the part where I give them information and they come to me - is that it's their choice. I won't get anything that I won't actually deserve.

good 2 no u have a realistic exspectation of fairness 4 how things work here

Life isn't fair.

[ Stiles and Lydia haven't really, well, been talking. Yes, they've delegated roles, and rules, and when he brought Rachel in, there was a discussion but they don't usually just chat. Or comment on each other. They've been orbiting the last couple weeks.

So when he hears Lydia making her post he hovers out of sight, waiting for her to finish before he comments. ]

You really sure you wanna put yourself out there? What if you get some crazy guy who wants to put your brain in a computer tube?

[ Yes this is a legitimate concern. ]

[She frowns. She had considered trying to send this only to human-friendly people, but honestly she's not even sure if that's possible.]

I think existing in this place on any level is a risk, Stiles. Who is to say that someone wouldn't kidnap me from the repair job, cut my hair off, and try to sell it?

[ Stiles still has feelings for her. That's obvious and he tries to keep them out of the way, to act neutral, but it's so intrinsic to him to think of keeping her safe.

He gestures one hand out in a sweeping gesture. ]

But that would just be your hair, and also, usually we're working together, you know? I got your back and you got mine.

[ not always true, the way repair works, but he'd tried. ]

I mean, a better job would be great but there's no guaranteee they're not just gonna kill you or kidnap you either. [ and he wouldn't be there. ]

Edited 2013-04-20 22:28 (UTC)

[She frowns. Glancing to him. She was sparing his sensitivities and stopped with the destruction of her hair, which for the record would be catastrophic.]

[She also is unsure about making any comment about having his back. She's fairly certain in any situation her flailing fists and high-pitched screams will not help at all. Now, if she had time to steal parts from the repairs and try to assemble some sort of explosive device... sure, but this isn't that sort of fake scenario that they're discussing.]

We also have bills to pay and monetary needs that aren't being met by our current income. We have to make changes and if I can get a better job, I think I should try.

I know, I know.

[ There's a defeated slump to his shoulder. Even living with his dad, he'd been spared the worst of things like this, rent and food costs and hell, even a protection bracket he wouldn't have known about. Dealing with it is hard but at least they aren't trying to ignore it. ]

I just don't know if putting your resume and face out there is safe, that's all.

[ Never mind that he'd posted to the network when he arrived and she had only done so in response to him. ]

[She sighs, rising to her feet and moving across the room. She gets a glass of water and takes a sip. It's not like she put all of her information there. It's just a list of skills. Not even a complete resume, which had been her first thought.]

It's just as safe as any other broadcast that I would do here and honestly, if someone wants to cut my head off and take my brain, I'm pretty sure they'll have a fight on their hands. [She will not go quietly.]

Besides, I'll run checks on all of them before I go anywhere.

[ there's a comment on the tip of his tongue about how she might fight but she's not exactly a fight-er, but that would be the all-too-aware pot calling the kettle black, so he bites it back. ]

Right, because if they're bad guys they're going to be posting about it on the network.

[ the cynicism is all he has left to fight on. he's not even sure why he thinks this is a bad idea - just that the idea of her getting hurt and him not being able to help is still terrifying. ]

[She doesn't think they'd be that oblique about it, but she's not an idiot, she can read between the lines and see who talks to them and then who they talk to. Everyone makes mistakes.]

What do you want, Stiles? [She can hear the tone, she can hear that he's being sort of, no more than sort of, negative about her attempts.]

Do you want to just keep doing what they expect? To do remedial jobs, that don't pay enough, and let all of our money go to protection?

[ Stiles feels his shoulders tense up when she questions him directly. ]

I want you to be safe! I want us both to stay alive until -

[ Until they can figure a way home, but he's not so sure that'll happen. It looks less and less likely but he's still holding out hope for it. ]

Look, I'm not saying to keep doing what you're doing, but you could've done something else instead of putting yourself out there like that.

[She understands what he's saying and really, it's not the first time she's heard this side of Stiles. It's the last thing she heard from him before they both were here.

She can't exactly undo what she did either and to be perfectly honest, she doesn't want to. She wants to do something worth her time, she wants to do something that is going to challenge her and give her something to enjoy doing. If she's going to be trapped here, why does she have to feel like she's trapped?]

Well, I did, Stiles. I put myself out there. Everyone that makes a broadcast here puts themselves out there. I'm trying to do something to help us. To help us survive, because this? [She gestures around them.] This is not exactly surviving, this is barely living.

And yes, now people know that there is a girl here who is smart and capable and willing to take a risk to get ahead. Maybe that is dangerous or maybe it's just smart, but either way I am not going to go back and erase it.

[Her tone isn't anger, it's not overly hostile, but there is a strong edge of frustration laced around each of her words.]

Edited (html............................pls) 2013-04-20 23:32 (UTC)

[ Even though she's not angry at him he can still hear that edge of frustration. However, he's feeling frustrated too because he can't make her understand why it worries him. And maybe that should be a clue to him too, but right now?

Right now he just waves his arms a little at his sides, giving her a look. ]

Yeah, a girl here who is smart and capable and if they lie well enough maybe someone will pay if they kidnap her! Or maybe they're the type of creature that wants to kill a human for being smart!

[ He's doing better than the last time they argued, beause he's not telling her how dying would affect him, and he's not advancing on her, keeping the counter between them. ]

[She's grateful for the counter. Too many arguments with men have ended with them in her face and she's not overly fond of that scenario. It's why she put something in front of her to begin with.]

So out of all the people that put notices up here, all the girls that put their face out there -- you're saying that I'm the one that's going to be kidnapped.

That I specifically need to be more careful than anyone else.

That's not what I'm saying.

[ Backtracking quickly, except that is what he's saying. At least in the sense of all those posts, he's never commented, only said something when he's seen her do it. ]

I mean, in general, we need to be careful, period. Who knows what could happen.

[Her lips purse. It's not that they need to be careful, because Lydia has done nothing but be careful. She's gone to work and come home. She's made a minimal impact in the world here and it's because she's being careful. She's not talking to everyone that puts a flag up for a cool ship or an interesting weapon. She's not venturing out to bars hoping for alcohol when there's no water. She's not doing anything dangerous -- except this one thing.

This one thing has now been deemed as dangerous to them and she can't help but feel upset by it.]

So, everything that you've done since you've arrived here - you've made sure that it's been careful. That you're being safe for the both of us. That you're taking precautions and not creating situations that could be dangerous. [Her arms fold over her chest.]

[ Stiles finds himself flinching internally at her words. Because he knows he hasn't been safe - he's come home drunk, he's ended up backseat to an alley fight that he still hasn't told Lydia about.

And it really all comes back to - ]

I - god dammit. It doesn't matter if I get hurt, okay? It matters if you do.

[ He's careful not to say that it'd make him upset, but the implication is there. ]

[When it boils down to that point, to her hearing that phrase again, she flinches. It's minor, barely noticeable, but she knows it happened. She felt it in her shoulders and now that she's standing there, she's hoping he didn't see it.]

I'm already here, Stiles. I've already been hurt - more than a few times and no one was there for me then, no one warned me off of whatever was going on and now that I've given you some glimpse into my reality... [She's yelling. She realizes this and she draws inward. Her mouth closes into a tight line and she holds her tongue before continuing in a calmer tone.]

It matters if you get hurt, but I'm not out there thinking that every single thing you do - no matter how idiotic or dumb I think it is is - is going to get you hurt.

So don't you dare stand there and tell me that I can't actually be useful, because of some percentage of risk that you've calculated. Of some hidden desire to keep me safe when you clearly failed at it before. [It feels like she's slapped him with that one. She regrets it the second it comes out of her mouth, because she knows that it was her choice to look for Jackson. It was her desires that put her on that field. She can't take her words back and she's not even sure if she wants to. There had been other times, other instances where the simple truth would've kept her safe... safer.]

Look, I already put it out there and I'm not taking it down. So, you can keep your opinions on what a walking target I am for being victimized to yourself.

[ He catches the flinch, but just as he opens his mouth to apologize, to try to take back his words again, she's speaking, her voice raising, and it makes his jaw snap shut, his eyes widening a little.

Because it is true. The lies they'd told her had apparently endangered her more, because if they'd said something, maybe she would have told them about Peter. About feeling like she was in a nightmare.

And her words make him flinch in kind like she has slapped him, looking away when she stops speaking. He has failed, in multiple ways, and the first was the one that snowballed all of her problems with Peter. ]

Okay.

[ It's the only thing he can say, now, to that, knowing he shouldn't feel like the one that's hurt but feeling that way anyway. ]

... For what it's worth, I'm sorry. And it's never been because I thought you were weak.

[ But because he wanted to 'protect' her doesn't excuse it and he knows it. ]

[The silence that comes after, no matter how slight feels much longer to her. It's all the immeasurable moments that are stacking up into this tight space of things that she just said and that he had to have heard. There's nothing to distract him, no phone ringing or the draw of a best friend to take him away from the truth of this moment.

When he accepts it, she exhales. A simple word and a near defeated tone coming from him. The tone makes her frown, disliking that she's created this sort of environment. She's going to have to share this space and to be honest, she's just grateful that Rachel isn't somewhere trying to ignore this happening.

Her hands close, drawing into tight fists at her sides to keep herself from wringing them. She wants to rub her thumb across her palm, to make her thumb make that small crackle of sound when it flexes. Instead she's still as she hears his apology. It feels too little, too late, but she knows that he's trying and she realizes that it's difficult to apologize when you're removed from the situation entirely. It's hard for her to talk about it. To think that she's been ripped away from that and it could not matter at all. She could have been pulled here alone and no one would have known.]

Thank you. [She accepts the apology with quiet words, now unsure of what to do. This isn't her best friend where they cry and accept that life sucks and then they hug and go shopping after ice cream. This is Stiles and she lives with him.

She doesn't ask him why, because she's sure she doesn't want to know. It doesn't matter why it happened, because it did. There's nothing that can change that and all she's trying to do is move on from that.

Lydia just needs to make sure people let her.]

[ Stiles would normally attempt a smile or a brush off at this point, but the whole thing just feels so heavy in a way he's uncomfortably familiar with. So instead he just nods his head as aknowledgement of what she said.

He could have been here alone and yes, that would have been worse. It's unfair to sometimes wish he had Scott here, but that's how he's feeling right now, a crushing feeling in his chest.

He is glad Rachel isn't here to see them fighting, and after a moment, he speaks. ]

Good luck. I'm gonna...

[ He points to his room and then beats a hasty retreat and think about what he's done. ]

[ Ouch. That's the only thing Rachel can think right now. It'd been impossible not to overhear at least parts of the conversation from her room, even if she'd been trying not to listen. She'd gotten enough to get the big picture. And when she hears Stiles retreat into his own room, she figures it's safe to come out.

Lydia's still out there, though, and while Rachel doesn't have any problem with her, she...really doesn't know her very well, either. She's not even entirely sure how cool Lydia is with her staying here. Well, whatever. It's only temporary, right?

She approaches Lydia with a sympathetic smile, tossing her hair over one shoulder. Maybe they can get along if she appeals to Lydia with common ground. ]

Guys, huh?

[Oh... oh, God. Lydia -- she hadn't... the shock on her face at the thought that Rachel had heard all of that, all of it is definitely not easily hidden. Taking a breath and exhaling it quickly, she tries to brush it off.]

I didn't know you were home, I wouldn't have... it's not his place to try and tell me what I should do while I'm here. [She's careful with her words, mostly because she knows Stiles is in his room and if Rachel could hear them, then Stiles can hear this.

It's not a good situation, regardless.]

I'm sorry if we disturbed whatever you were doing.

[ Rachel shakes her head quickly. Stiles doesn't seem like a bad guy, honestly, but all guys have their heads up their asses at least a little bit. ]

No, really, you don't have to apologize. I mean...this is your place and all. You weren't bothering me, I promise.

[ She smiles at Lydia, genuinely. Sure, Rachel can fake it, but honestly, she feels for Lydia. ]

All guys can be jerks some of the time, even when they're trying to help. Especially when they're trying to help. [ She doesn't sound condescending, though, like she's coming down hard on Stiles, just...sympathetic. She's been there too, okay. ] For what it's worth? I think it's great you're trying so hard to put yourself out there.

[She knows Stiles is trying to help, but she's not sure where it is that she asked for help or his opinion and yet there it is. All... filled with hypocrisy and everything.]

Well, we'll see if it even gets me anywhere. So far all it's gotten me is a lot of trouble for my efforts.

I mean it, though. This place isn't exactly friendly, you know? It's not like I want to be stuck working these crap repair jobs forever, either. And...okay, I know this sounds totally corny, but it kind of makes me feel better about wanting to put myself out there, seeing somebody else do it.

[ It sounds fake, but it's not. Rachel doesn't usually get this honest with somebody she doesn't know all that well, but the truth is, she can respect Lydia. The girl knows what she wants, and she's going for it. That's a quality that Rachel can appreciate -- and one she values in herself, too. Her smile is just a touch sheepish, and she shrugs her shoulders. ]

Sorry, I didn't mean to get all personal on you. Just -- I think you should go for it, is all. And I'm going to, too. I know money doesn't come easy around here.

Edited 2013-04-27 18:50 (UTC)

I'm glad that I can be inspirational. [She says that with a hint of pride, her chin lifting slightly.]

It's okay though, too. I mean, the personal part. I think it's natural to just ramble when you're trying to make someone feel better and I know that's what you were trying to do.

All I see are long sentences and words. Cut to the chase girl, what can you do?

[It's ... it's not long sentences! It's just a list of skills. It's not as though she wrote a thesis on what she wants to be when she grows up. She frowns at the message.]

Since you clearly don't have time to read a list of what I can do, how about instead I help make it easy on you. What do you need?

Does Omega seem like a place where people have the patience to read a wall of words? If you are seeking employment, a succinct description would suit your needs better rather than the long ramble that you wrote.

[But for all his ~~rudeness~~ brusqueness, he does read through her long list of skills.]

You are familiar with the human body? Perhaps you should look for a job at the clinic. It is a busy place; they would appreciate the extra pair of hands.

[He should know, he's a weekly visitor there.]

[She's still not sure where he's seeing this long ramble.]

I'll look at the clinic, but I'm also looking for a few options.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

oo1. | ℒ | video

text

text ||

text

text ||

text

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

action;

no subject

time to sort out these poor feefees of his

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

THANK YOU FOR POINTING OUT HIS HYPOCRISY

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

Text

text ||

no subject

no subject